Lost in Translation

I am in the middle of my third week in Mexico. Slowly the realization that I have left my home, my comforts, my life that I am so accustomed to, is sinking in. Spanish being only the second language I have ever been taught, I am challenged deeply with many new words and an entirely new format of speaking and forming sentences. I started school the day after I arrived and have had about 10 classes. I feel like I am learning more every day but it is a struggle for me to live with the fact that I cannot read or understand a lot of what is going on around me. My roomate tells me stories of his life with theatrical excitement, making it a little easier to make out what he is trying to say, however I am missing huge pieces of his stories, the way he is using his words to express who he is and how he feels about things.


I am learning to listen, and only listen. To listen more and then process what I think I heard and let go of what I might not have. When I do understand my responses are limited, very limited, and I am learning to not respond to anything. Conversations that I desperatly want to be a part of I cannot. My patience is growing, my desire to learn is growing, my heart is growing. I am reading the collection of comics that Carlos has from the 70s because the pictures with the words help me and it is fun to read Superman and Pink Panther comics written 40 years ago. Carlos is in the process of taping the names of household objects to the objects in the house, and then he writes the verbs or other words that I might use with that name. It is a brilliant way to learn common words.


I am learning the value of silence in many situations. When I want to say something judgmental I usually cannot and just have to think about it which fades away very quickly, rather than speaking of something that really has no meaning. When I see something I want to share I hold back for lack of vocabulary to describe what I want to say and my words remain thoughts. I am learning to appreciate the process, not knowing what people are saying around me, not being bothered by someones phone call or conversation with a friend. I can read or do work while other people are talking and this has never been easy for me when I can understand the language. I am deeply thankful for this experience.